When a member says you're wrong in public

Sooner or later it happens to every community manager: you post an announcement or make a call, and a member replies, in front of everyone, that you've got it wrong. Your stomach drops a little. This lesson is about what you do in the next ten minutes.

Slow down before you reply

The first reply sets the tone for everyone reading, and far more people read than comment. Give yourself a few minutes. Reread what they actually wrote, not what it felt like they wrote. Most public pushback is about a decision, not about you, even when the wording is sharp.

Separate the point from the delivery

Ask yourself two questions. Is there something true in what they said? And is the way they said it within your guidelines? These are different questions, and they need different answers:

• Right and polite: say so, publicly and plainly. "Good catch, I got this wrong, here's the fix." Members trust hosts who can do this.
• Right but rude: acknowledge the point in public and handle the tone in a private message.
• Wrong but polite: explain your reasoning once, thank them for raising it, and leave room for others to weigh in.
• Wrong and rude: that's a moderation issue, and the moderation basics lesson covers it.

Don't move everything to private messages

"Let's take this offline" can sound like you're hiding something. If the disagreement is about how the community works, other members deserve to see how it gets resolved. Keep the substance public and only take the personal parts private.

Your task: find a past thread where someone disagreed with you or a moderator. Write the reply you wish you'd sent, in four sentences or fewer.